Quirk 9 of 11...

Extremely well done to you then.  Look at you - you've clicked on the jukebox.  You've found another hidden page.  Not really much point in finding it, mind, since there's nothing really for you to see right now.  I'll butcher something into it for now, and then chop that when something good comes along.  Thing is, it's never good to cut things out, is it.  It's always hard.  Hmm...

Well, I've got a week and a day left before I'm 21. There you go. What have I done? Well, probably more than I think. Then again, I think too much, does that mean I've done too much? Or simply that I am thinking too much about what I have done? But then that has just made me think more. And more. And more. Come off it. What's going on?! It's currently a Monday afternoon.  So much I want to do. So little inclination to do it. Someone needs to take control of me. Need to bounce off someone that gets things done or something.  Yeah, right.  Talking rubbish now. And lots of it too. The time of the earth rides majestically like a Phoenix over the sun tipped mountains on the horizon. Faster and faster she runs, until she is almost stumbling with excitement. Less and less she can wait for the news she has to tell. My, how long she had waited; and now all that parts her from it now is travel. From the other side, the clouds rolled slowly across the plain. They were much much lower than normal, but unfortunately, the natives left it un-noticed.

In the distance, far off towards the sea, a lonely deep bell slowly tolled, but sadly there was no-one with the logic at that time to recall the ill health of the bed ridden bell toller. An eagle, at the top of the highest tree, sharply turned it's head towards the water, as a flock of smaller birds flew away from it.

The girl's excitement ran strongly forwards.

"Mummy, Mummy, I've found it," she cried, when her home came into distance. "Mummy, come quickly. I've found it."

The door opened and out came the girl's Mother, still mixing dough.

"What is it pet?" she called.

"I've found it at last, I've found it," said the girl, running up and hugging her Mother's legs.

"Found what dear? What have you fo......"

The Mother looked over her Daughter's shoulder and became increasingly distant as she spotted the approaching fog.
Then she was shocked enough to drop the thick mixing bowl onto the girl's head, knocking her cold to the floor. Over the top of the cloud flew an evil-eyed fridge freezer combination, singing songs by Andrew Lloyd Webber.

And with the Fridge freezer combination, there came the onslaught of jet propelled terra-cotta plant pots full of an evil fusion of Boddingtons and Acid Ribena.

The end of the world, to the Mother, and indeed everyone she knew, was imminent, and it would hurt. All of the energy that she was conserving. All of the anger. All of her feelings.

Everything that she was saving up for later she now used in one, life concluding, scream. She needed such reserves
no longer.

People looked out of windows, ran out of doors, and popped in from neighboring villages to se what this lady's commotion was all about. They all stopped, upon seeing, and they all screamed also.

And the eagle had long since flown to protect itself, and unfortunately fell out of the sky of old age. Kind of a shame he didn't stick around, but you can't have everything all of the time.

* * * * *

"Why d'yo s'pose he's in a mood?" said Nuff, looking up at Austin, hands behind her back, plodding along like a school-girl.

Austin snapped out of mild ponderence and looked over to her. "Oh, don't worry about him," He said smiling. "He often gets like this. He's just tired, that's all."

"Am not," came a blunt voice, Christian's voice, from 10 yards up the road.

"Oops," whispered Austin to Nuff. They both giggled.

"Never mind 'Oops' said Christian. "Mind more about dinner. We haven't eaten since our last meal."

Austin 'tutted' his eyebrows. "None of us have food. Worrying about it only draws further attention to it. People cope better with extreme situations when in a relaxed state. Now why don't you just sna......

"Stop!" shouted Christian, stopping walking. "I hear dinner."

"I don't hear anything," said Austin catching up with Christian."

"Me neither."

"I've got Super Hearing turned on," said Christian. "And I can hear dinner coming our way."

"Do we have Super Hearing?"

"How do you think I heard you Oopsing?"

"Actually, now that you come to mention it, my Super Nasel Detection

System, does rather pick up something of the dinner variety."

Nuff looked at them both and concluded that boys will be boys will be messing around in their own language to relieve the situation a little.

Well, something along those lines anyway. She held her arms out to the sky, joined in on the act, and shouted, "Oh might Lord KentuckyMcDonaldBurgerKingWimpious. I call on you to serve me with dinner."

Christian and Austin stopped talking and looked at her. An eagle fell out of the sky and into Nuff's out-stretched arms.

"Shit," said Christian in awe.

"Shit," said Austin in amazement.

"Shit," said Nuff.

Christian pulled a set of knifes and forks out of his Tardis Trunks, "Heeeeeere's dinner," he said.

Austin went off and lit a fire.

"No wait!" cried Nuff. "We can't eat him."

"Why not?" said Austin.

"Turned extremely sentimental all of a sudden, have we?" added Christian.

"Nope. The bird's not dead yet."

Some food in Austin's stomach tried to get out the way it came in.

"You mean the bird's not dead yet?" said Christian.

"Take a guess," said Nuff.

"But why?" said Austin. "It wouldn't just fall out of the sky, would it?"

"It's on it's way out. I'll try some telepathy on it to see what's-a hap-hap with it."

Nuff gently put a finger and thumb on either side of the bird's forehead. She did a few strange things for a bit. "O my....Oh no," she said.

"What? What is it?" said Austin.

"Dinner's got to hold. There's big trouble."

"Trouble? What kind of trouble?" said Christian, looking over.

"Big trouble."

"What's happening?"

"The village just over that hill has been attacked by the flying singing fridge freezer and it's army of terra-cotta plant pots."
Christian and Austin looked at her for a while, then looked at each other for a while. They finished the whole thing off by laughing.

Christian walked over and picked the eagle up. "Snap out of it Nuff, it's Dinner Time."

He threw the eagle on the fire, proving that whether or not Nuff was joking, the bird was definitely dead now.

And cooking.

Nuff looked up. "No it isn't," she said in a strong voice. "No. we've got a village to save."

September 1994.